Tips to Become the Main Character in Your Life

We only live once, and that is a FACT. So, are you the main character in your story, or you’re allowing other people to control you? Unfortunately, in some cases, parents, friends, and society as a whole want to control how we act. You go to school, go to college or university, then get married and get children. This is the allowed procedure, whereby if one decides to do things differently, they are harshly judged.
But is this correct? I am not suggesting that we go rogue and start acting out, but I am saying that we should discover ourselves, our likes, and live it. We should not allow other people to control us; instead, we should be the main characters in our story. Below are some tips that will help us achieve that;
Put Yourself First
To be the main character, you should away put yourself first. If your friend comes asking you to take her somewhere and maybe you need to rest, I don’t think it’s selfish if you politely tell her that you can’t. That way, you can be able to get adequate rest and be more productive.
Stop Pleasing People
No matter how hard we try, we can never please everyone. There will always be people to judge us. Therefore, we should only concentrate on building ourselves and avoid minding what people say about us. As long as we aim to become better humans and are not hurting anybody, we don’t owe anyone anything.
Work On Yourself
Being the main character means that you should aim to do the best in everything. If it’s studies do your best, be the best mum and wife, positively. If you can impact someone’s life, do it. Working on ourselves will enable us to appreciate the good things and people in our lives.
Don’t Be Afraid to Say NO
NO is a sentence. It does not require any explanation. Therefore, if someone asks you to do anything you don’t want to do, say NO and period. Sometimes a family member may feel entitled to show up in your house and start asking for money or help. But sometimes, we may be in a dark place in our lives. It is okay to say no, to prevent too much stress.
Have a Safe Place
Life sometimes comes with stress. Be it from work, family, friends, or school. We may sometimes feel overwhelmed due to the different things we go through daily. So, it’s is great to have a safe space to express your feelings. It can be writing in your journal, talking to someone you completely trust, seeing a therapy, prating, meditate or even going to a walk or gym. Make sure you find out what works for you, and choose the best way to take your problems to handle them most efficiently and effectively.

Let light lead you.

Jenny Simaloi

You wanna maintain a healthy lifestyle; do this;

Goin to the gym ain’t the only way to be healthy. Infact you can be religiously going to the gym but you’re still eating unhealthy, then this become plus one minus one.

Hence in order to be overall healthy, there some things that we must put in place. Our bodies are like our houses, if you don’t clean your house, you don’t throw trash away, you don’t arrange it well, the your house will be unorganized and it’ll stink. Same goes to our bodies, if we don’t eat healthy, if we don’t become active, our bodies will “stink” and we end up depending on medication to live.

So below are some tip that you can you can corporate into your lifestyle in order to take good care of your body;

1. Be active– yes you can have a gym membership, but also the’re a myriad of other things that you can do. Like practising yoga, biking, going for a walk every morning and others.

2. Eat a healthy diet– Eat a combination of different foods, including fruit, vegetables, legumes, nuts and whole grains. By eating healthy you will reduce your risk of malnutrition and noncommunicable diseases (NCDs) such as diabetes, heart disease, stroke and cancer. And you don’t have to have lot’s of money to do this, start small as you increase.

3. Reduce consuming harmful fats- Fats consumed should be less than 30% of your total energy intake. This will help prevent unhealthy weight gain and NCDs. There are different types of fats, but unsaturated fats are preferable over saturated fats and trans-fats. WHO recommends reducing saturated fats to less than 10% of total energy intake; reducing trans-fats to less than 1% of total energy intake; and replacing both saturated fats and trans-fats to unsaturated fats.

5. Practice safe sex-Looking after your sexual health is important for your overall health and well-being. Practice safe sex to prevent HIV and other sexually transmitted infections like gonorrhoea and syphilis.

4. Reduce alcohol consumption– There is no safe level for drinking alcohol. Consuming alcohol can lead to health problems such as mental and behavioural disorders, including alcohol dependence, major NCDs such as liver cirrhosis, some cancers and heart diseases, as well as injuries resulting from violence and road clashes and collisions.

Energy from the Tokyo Olympians

Normally, I am not an Olympic fan, but on this particular day, I was forced to watch the Olympics. And I am glad I did. Because it motivated me to rise up and do some things that I planned to do but didn’t.

I was seated in my place of work, it was a boring day, I didn’t have internet connection so the only thing I did was watch the Olympics. Normally I’d only be interested to see the final results, who won what in what.

While watching, I saw the confidence, the sweat, the hard work, the consistency, the pain and finally the joy of getting that reward, the joy of breaking a world record, the joy of being celebrated by people who don’t even know you .

Victory is very sweet but you have to sweat to get it. There is no shortcut. Therefore, in order to get things going, In order to succeed in our dreams and visions, we must sweat, we must keep going, we must work smart. Hence arise and do that thing that you’ve always wanted to.

Rise and keep soldering on.

Jenny Simaloi

Caring for my body is of fundamental importance.

Do you want to lose weight or do you want to gain it? Either way, good food and weight lifting may just be what you’ve been looking for.

For my case, it’s the latter. I am a petite person and for a while I had this desire to gain some weight. Another thing is I also wanted to gain my muscle gain and increase my energy.

And so when I started going to the gym to do weight lifting, I’ve had enormous changes. But these changes are not coming as first as I anticipated. This is because every good thing needs commitment and consistency.

So I’ve been working out for 5 months now, and the first 3 months I didn’t see any changes. But the last 2 months I changed some things so as to see if I’ll have some changes and see some gains.

I changed my diet completely and started eating healthier foods. I went to the gym 5 days a week without fail. And after a month I had added 2 more kgs to my weight.

And then another more month and I had added another kg. After getting these results I was so happy and excited. This is because I reach a weight gain that I have never reached in my life. As small as this may seem, it is really huge for me. Because I know the sacrifice that I’ve had to undergo to get here. I am still going forward, to eat healthy, lifting weights and maintaining a good lifestyle.

And so, if you have the same goal, loosing weight, gaining weight or just maintaining it, consistency is key.

Also don’t be too hard on yourself, celebrate your small gains, because they’ll amount to the gains that your anticipating to get,

And you can agree with me that in order to see a change in any aspect of your life, consistency and sacrifice are the major key.

My lover was someone’s else’s lover

I was in love, madly in love, we literally stayed together for three months, our lives revolved around going to class, and then to each other’s house, if he’s not in my house, I was in his and vice versa. We were young, just started University.

I never felt this feeling before. I used to see it in movies and read it in novels, and now here I was, experiencing the same thing that they called love; the happiness, the butterflies in my stomach, the crazy good sex and all the good feelings all at once. And then I knew, voila, I am in love, madly in love. 

I started creating our future in my mind. How he’ll introduce me to his parents, how we’ll have a boy and a girl, how we’ll grow old together. And all the fantasies of love.

Then after 3 months of this good feeling, my lover, my perfect lover started changing, he started having some “meetings”, but I mean, he’s a man, he needs to have deals to get money.

Then this day he was so high (on probably weed) and he showed me a picture of this dark skinned, pretty girl. And he said, I am in love with this girl. Weeell, I laughed, you know, he was high, things that people say when they’re high. 

But no, my guy was serious, he was in love with this other person, and he’s been dating her since high school, but had had some quarrels and I was his destruction. 

There are some feelings that can’t be described, you know. That’s why it’s called a heartbreak. My lover was someone’s else’s lover. I was broken, my plans and wishes of the future shattered. I was alone, all alone and lonely.

It took me 3 years to start healing that wound but still I have never fallen in love again, I am now older and wiser. I will never fall in love again, but if love ever comes my way again, I will be healthy in love, sanely in love and peacefully in love.

Why You Should Marry Late in Life (from 28 years old)

First a disclaimer, there is no right or wrong way to live this life, when we are born we don’t come with a manuscript. All that happens is we are socialized into our cultures, religions and whaterview.

But if you look at some instances pertaining when and who to marry, it just makes a lot of sense for people to marry late in life. Especially right now that divorce rates are high and rising, economy is bad and gender based violence has spiked.

Below are some reasons why I think you should marry late (between 28 to 38).

1. You’ll have established your career, if you wanted to reach PhD level, I’m sure by the time your 35 you’ll have accomplished that, by that age also, you’ll have established your career on a solid foundation meaning you have some financial security.

2. You’ll have known the kind of man/woman that you’ll want to settle with. You’ll have gone on casual dates with different people and have established your “taste”.

3. You’ll have known if you want kids or not. I think marrying or having kids should be a personal choice, so I believe by that age one will have known that.

4. You’ll be mature enough. You’ll have known yourself completely, you’ll have a solid confidence and emotional intelligence, so even if things go haywire, you’ll still enjoy your life.

Before make a commitment of marriage, please make sure you know what your getting into. Be ready to sacrifice and commit so that you succeed. Also remember if you don’t want to ever marry it’s still okey and life will still be beautiful.

Love and kindness be with you. Peace.


Carpe Diem!

I will be happy when I get that job, I will loose weight when I get a gym membership, I will buy my partner a gift when I get this amount of money. I will start hustling when I’m done with school. I will, I will , I will.

That’s what most of us, keep on telling ourselves. It is a good visualization but how long will it take us to treat our loved ones well, Untill we get that check? How long will that check take.

So what about we start actualizing all our dreams right now bit by bit, if you want to loose weight, start with a simple walk every morning, if you want to gift your partner start with simple things even if it’s a beautiful dress, you know.

Most of the times we aim at greater things but even these simple acts of kindness will bring us a great deal of satisfaction. Saying hello to your neighbor and asking them how they are may mean a lot to them. That may brighten their gloomy day.

So friends, instead of us waiting for that perfect opportunity to be good to ourselves and others, what about we create those special moments, what about we do what we always wanted to do in bits. A journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step.

Stop waiting for the perfect time but create that perfect time. Stop waiting for money but better your skills and money will come. Thank God for internet, we can access uncountable skills all over internet for free, so let’s seize the opportunity.

Carpe diem!!


Overcoming the Little “Demons”

When I was in primary school, there was this girl who always scored so poorly, and after finishing KCPE (Kenya Certificate of Primary Education) exams, she didn’t go to secondary school, instead she opted to do casual jobs and started being an adult as a teenager.

She did not perform poorly because she was ‘stupid’ or her brain was damaged and couldn’t understand the reading and writing, her poor performance were as a result of her belief. A belief that she was ‘cursed’. She used to say that she was the cursed one of her family, the black sheep who was going to amount to nothing.

That time I didn’t think much about her statement, but when I met her in the market sometime ago, her story became clear in my mind. she believed that she amounted to nothing and the sad thing is, she is still doing casual jobs here and there and she now has 3 kids. It’s my hope that she will not instill the same beliefs to her kids.

So when you look at her scenario, it is self created, she probably didn’t get someone to save her from her own mental wreckage, but I am here to remind us that our little voices and constant thoughts shape our decisions and eventually our lives, so lets be careful what we are telling ourselves, lets replace the negative talk with a positive one and that will change our course. It may not be easy at first but with practice we will start seeing results no matter how long the process can be.

Be kind and stay safe.